The number one question I ask myself is: Why is losing weight so hard? Over the course of the past year, I’ve worked out at least 5x a week, ate healthy MOST of the time and am pretty active. So what gives?
Well here’s the thing. I went into the doctor for my yearly physical a month or so ago and of course, had to step on the scale. The scale read 136 pounds. I thought to myself, “I’ve weighed 136 pounds for almost 5 months now, why can’t I just lose weight?” Then when talking with my doctor, she mentioned that I had lost some weight since last year and also added that I looked terrific. I thought she’s probably just saying it to be nice, so I brushed her compliment off. I then asked her how much I weighed a year ago and she told me 151 pounds. I cringed when I heard that number, still dissatisfied with my current weight.
Weight loss: 15 pounds in 5 months. Currently I still weigh around 136 pounds. Also, excuse the photo of me with a baseball glove; Tony and I were playing catch.
Ahhhh, here we go again. The thoughts of a perfectionist. After struggling with an eating disorder in college, my brain is weirdly wired when it comes to food and exercising. Deprive, eat too much, exercise – the neverending cycle.
I left the doctor’s office and made the drive back home. Thoughts were racing through my head, such as how can I lose more weight by the end of the year and what can I cut out of my diet that I just don’t need? The attainment for perfectionism in everything sounds ridiculous, I know. The doctor said I was at a perfect weight for my height, so why can’t I just be happy with that? I’m able to eat what I want in moderation and never feel deprived, so why won’t these thoughts just go away?
I text my mom in hope for some encouragement. She congratulated me and told me how proud she was of me. Later, I told Tony about my weight loss and he seemed to brush it off his shoulders saying, “I love you no matter what.” Adorable, I know.
These words from the people I care about were uplifting. When I racked my brain for how much weight 15 pounds really was and peeked at photos from last March, I realize how much more comfortable I am in my own skin these days. Those pounds were a huge weight lifted off my shoulders (ha!) both physically and mentally. During that time period, I learned how balance my love for food and exercise with my passion for nutrition. Sure there are still things I don’t like about my body, but doesn’t everyone have those small insecurities? I’m betting yes.
I noticed my arms, waist and hips became more toned and slimmer
It probably took me a good 5 months to get down to 136. Of course, my ultimate desire is always to lose weight as quickly as possible but that doesn’t always work out for the best; typically I’ll feel deprived and end up eating all the things I missed out on later.
First, I began analyzing my exercise habits and switched up my routine to include more cardio, went for plenty of walks around the lake with friends, and stuck to lifting weights only 3x per week. I also only really pushed myself 30% of the time. (When I say push I mean hardass plyometric, cardio and weight lifting workouts.) This helped tremendously! Previously I had been doing close to the same workouts and a friend recommended that my body might need a routine change. She was right.
one of my favorite workouts — yoga!
Next was my eating. Probably the hardest part was cutting back on sweets. No matter if something is healthy, I learned that you can still overdo it. I brought most of my snacks and lunches to work and ate salads nearly every day. I said no to snacks passed around the office, they were almost never worth the calories. I ate small meals every 2-3 hours. My dinners were high in protein and included healthy carbs (like sweet potatoes) and of course, veggies. Each week I would allow myself a cheat meal or two which included pizza or a big night of going out and drinking too much wine.
And… slowly but surely, the weight came off.
These days the scale jumps up and down. A little up now that it’s cookie season and since I LOVE LOVE LOVE to bake. But overall, I know my boundaries. I practice yoga 2x per week, do cardio 2x per week and try to lift weights 2-3x per week. Each week is different though and I’m always eager to try out new fitness classes or experiment with new food. Best of all, I’m so happy to have great health and that in itself is good enough.
I’d love to hear your weight loss stories, struggles or whatever else you feel like talking about. I’m all ears and of course, I’m glad we can be open and non-judgmental with one another.